Go directly to jail, do not pass go, do not collect $200.

So I didn´t really think about what the prison I visited today would be like, and the truth is that it didn´t look anything like how prisons in the US and portrayed in the movies. But in the end it was still a jail, and that alone was pretty intimidating! It is just for women, by the way. I went with the very nice volunteer coordinator at the school, and the jail is only a few blocks away. There were three police men standing outside. Once inside, the guy we spoke to spoke Spanish quite fast and I only understood a fifth or so (I´m frustrated with not being able to understand and speak as much as I think I should be able to, but thats for another entry and I am not studying as much as I should be). I did pick up that I could do whatever I want, but that giving English classes might not work, since after a few classes people wouldn´t show up. I instead should talk to the women first, and they´d all tell me that whatever they were "in" for, they didnt do it. He always was saying it was safe - no drugs, alcohol etc. There´s been 2 other English speaking volunteers, one who is giving poetry classes. The volunteer guy knew I didn´t understand much. He told me later that once a volunteer gets to know the women, the real story about the crimes comes out.

Then we walked around, saw the small library, the cells. The building itself is 2 stories and similar to the school - a covered roof, but transparent, and an inner courtyard. There were women downstairs eating lunch, and then we went to that area and I was introduced to a woman who spoke some English. She took me to the part outside, with a volleyball net. There were women all around sitting and talking, or knitting, but it was just a little strange because they weren´t there because they wanted to socialize, or had nothing better to do, or just to learn a craft: they had to be there. It wasn´t until the end of the conversation when she couldn´t remember the word "stealing" and was asking me what it was when I realized she wasn´t staff - she too was an inmate. She said "it wasn´t me, but I´m here" and seemed pretty ok with that.

I think that right now, that kind of volunteering would be too much. I just wouldn´t be able to understand much of what anyone said to me, and I think that I´m not able to get past the¨"its a jail part" when I´m still trying to learn how to understand and communicate. The volunteer guy said one of the first things the staff person there said was to always keep in mind that some of the women were going to be difficult to work with, and although I do want to teach English (its pretty much the only valuable skill I have for a Spanish-speaking person or organization), I think I imagine a room of 10 students, eyes shining, so eager to learn English they´re on the edge of their seats...and that might not be what it is like in the jail.

So for now I´m going to continue to obsess about whether there´s another place I´d rather be. While I like Cuenca as a city and it feels safe and is interesting, the fact is I don´t have any friends and there aren´t many students at the school until the summer, so I don´t forsee having friends in the near future. While that isn´t what I came here for, it would be nice... Maybe the problem is that I am coming straight from Guatemala, where (surprisingly?) there was a very strong, obvious community of English speaking long term residents/volunteers. I mentioned to another student here that Cuenca didn´t have that, and she said "do you want that?" And no, but...yes. I think I might. I just don´t have the language skills to have Ecuadorian friends, and besides family members of my homestay family, I don´t know where I´d meet them, anyway. I wandered through the university today and there weren´t tons of bulletin boards with activities and club meetings, like there are in the states. And even if there were things going on, I wouldn´t understand what people were saying. I guess I am thinking there are other places (most noteably Cusco, Peru and Quito) where there are large communities of ex-pats, or at least English speakers, and where my experience might be more than just taking classes and living with a family (although I guess that can be enough). Every so often I am realistic about volunteering options in other places, and between not wanting to work with kids and not speaking Spanish, I´m pretty useless. So maybe instead of settling in one place, I can spend a few weeks in different places and get learning Spanish in along with seeing new places. But then I won´t have the time I should be devoting to studying, since in the afternoon I´ll be doing sightseeing. I´ll have to think hard about it all this weekend. For some reason Bolivia continues to sound appealing. Maybe just because its much harder to get to from North America than either Ecuador or Peru. I´ve also invited myself to visit Fernando in Lima, and I think that could be very fun.

If anyone has any insights on Cuzco, Bolivia, or making friends let me know (the whole friend thing is a recurring thing for me when I´m living abroad - when am I going to learn that it isn´t easy?).